I recently started writing six stories. I'm not going to say that it's been 'draining' because writing gives me energy and keeps me sane. Keeping all of the details straight, going back to edit, categorizing story ideas and determining where they should go... it's a lot to keep in mind. I don't outline, either. Wherever I stopped writing is where I pick the story up, all of the characteristics and plot-lines are already in my head. Wherever the story goes is where it goes. And I need a break. There are so many characters in my head. Some of them don't have names, but when a certain song plays or an image flashes through my mind... I know where the scene should go and which characters are stepping onto center stage. There's an endless amount of room, I'm not worried about losing anything. Just... I want to take a step back for a moment and stop writing reality into fiction. Memories are clouding over.
'The Handcuff Bracelet' started about a year ago. Over four hundred thousand words later, it's been a huge emotional investment. It's almost done, I've been procrastinating because of it. I'll never forget how it started. I was up at four in the morning, trying to write anything... watching music videos on VH1, Ke$ha's 'Tik Tok' music video started to play. For some reason, the way she was sitting in the car... her handcuff bracelet caught my attention and bam. The last thing I read was 'Twilight,' and the whole series really pissed me off. Without Stephanie Meyer, the characters wouldn't have come into existence. She does deserve a lot of credit, and I bear her no ill-will. Just... Edward and Bella, her versions, are... to me, they didn't fulfill their potential.
Her vampires sparkled. Enough said there. Honestly. When I think vampire, I think 'Lestat.' Then I think Eric, from True Blood. Very dominant, take-charge, nothing keeps them down types. Until Anne Rice found fucking Christ and turned her back on the vampires. No, I'll never forgive her for that. What kind of writer could- I can't comprehend.
So, 'The Handcuff Bracelet' started... going a completely different direction than where I thought it would. 'Switches and Subs' became my main bdsm story. I needed a break from 'Handcuff' and I was worried about moving to California. After searching, for fucking years... I found a Dominant that I was incredibly compatible with, but I had already made the plans to move. 'Switches' died for a while and then resumed when i got back to New Jersey six months later. Thankfully, distance and time weren't such huge factors as I packed up, reconnected with my Dom, and resumed life on the East Coast.
Two personal stories started, I've lost track of 'Phantasms' completely. Random story ideas filter through now and again, but, for Twilight at least, the plot bothers me. That she went through all of the nauseating pregnancy symptoms and didn't elaborate on the sex scene between Edward and Bella... what the fuck? Why did Jake keep coming around? He obviously wasn't wanted, nor can I believe that Bella gave in and decided that she loved him. Maybe if Edward had been less of a gentleman, taking what Bella offered instead of wanting to protect her from himself All of the time...
I like Twilight only because I can enjoy the first three books and store writing energy every time I sigh in frustration or roll my eyes at the decisions character's made. All energy is good energy, and anger is my main emotion. Calm, focused anger, not out of control rage like I used to harbor. It's productive instead of destructive.
The blog, I think, is my way of gearing up for more serious writing. A step away from fanfiction, which has helped me keep from losing my mind. The stories will continue, I'll let them tear through me for as many sleep-deprived nights as it takes for them to finish. I need to branch out, though. This happened with fanfiction back in 2003, too. Then I stopped writing anything that had pre-made characters. That won't happen this time, I'm better at multi-tasking.
End of blog entry one? That wasn't as difficult as I thought it'd be. Once I'm committed, it's no holds barred... why would I have thought this would go any differently?
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